15 DAYS OF DISPELLING MYTHS

I have been donning different hats at work for the last decade and a half without taking a moment to pause. Last 15 years have been a journey of setting goals and achieving them, learning new things and taking them along from one place to another, building relationships that have enriched me and led me to realizations along the way.

The last few days have been the only 15 days in the last 15 years wherein, I freed myself from: professional roles, responsibilities, titles, organizations and everything associated with work. The experience has been exhilarating to say the least. I allowed myself to feel and observe instead of doing anything. I allowed time to decide the course of the day. I allowed emotions to come while I remained still. They came like the waves of the ocean on the shore and receded back in the expanse. I allowed the myths to play themselves out only to see them disappear. Here are a few myths busted and realizations emerged.

Myth 1: I will do what I love when I have the time

I have often led myself to fall in the rabbit hole of ‘time’. I have often been caught saying that I don’t get the time to do what I want to do, or I have too much packed in the day. As I write this, I realize that finally when you have the time, you might not have the inclination. Time is like water, it’s not something you can hold. It’s actually very simple. We always find the time to do what we want to do in that moment. If we cannot, we always can find time some other day. We cannot plan our life to say that one day I will have the time to do this & that because for all you know, when that day arrives, your priorities might have shifted. Sometimes, its good to allow life to reveal itself to you and know that you can do whatever you want whenever you want only if you put your mind to it. Time is not the real issue!

Myth 2: Resting = lie down and sleep

I allowed my mind to rest which does not mean I slept all day or ate tubs of ice cream while binge watching. For me with was about not planning a day, not looking at what all I could pack and do in a day. It was not about how many books I could read or how many articles I could write. It was not about accomplishments. It was about allowing myself to slow down to breathe, allowing my mind to stop racing to solve a problem.

Resting is about conserving energy and there could be more than one way to do it. A light conversation, a non sensical movie, a middle of the day workout, cycling in the rain or just doing whatever you like to do on that day. It’s about thinking less and living more.

Myth 3: Kids need time

This is one of the strongest myths I have grappled with. Time is not a commodity that you can give to your children. They learn the most by observing you. Their perception of life is through you. My child would hear me more when I would put him to sleep at night and read a bedtime story than me trying to have a conversation with him all day. He would learn more from me by just seeing me work and finding time for him than by spending all day everyday with him. A classic case of quality versus quantity.

Myth 4: Breaks are meant for self- discovery and this nothingness is what I need

Break is a form of stillness, a way to recuperate. It is a way allow yourself to shed off old skin. Wash away all the perceptions, opinions, and cleanse yourself. However, like everything else, its not something that you need for an indefinite period. Its not something that you can live with beyond a stipulated period. It is the time to realize that no matter who you are, you need to pause to breathe. Give yourself time to break away from a regimented life. However, if routine and structure is what defines you, then you will bring it back in your life. Nothingness is just acceptance without judgement, allowing yourself to be unbridled, spending time with yourself to refuel, reinvigorate and get back.

So, as I brace myself now for a new role, I go fulfilled knowing that I enjoyed every moment of what I have done and felt all this while. My happiness is not dependent on what I do, its dependent on how every moment of life makes me feel.